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Monday, November 11, 2019

November is national adoption awareness month. (note that I did not say national Let's celebrate adoption month.) I'm know we are all likely aware of adoption, but I don't think we're all likely aware of the implications and complexities of adoption. Thus the awareness part of national adoption awareness month.

Is there something you've always wanted to ask about adoption but never did? Ask me.
Is there something that's stopping you from adopting? Tell me what it is.
Do you know someone who has or is adopting and you want to be a better support to them? Let's talk about that.
Does it scare you? Good. It should. We can go there.
Are you worried about picking the right words to say something or worse saying the wrong things and offending them? The lingo is fraught with hurdles and I can explain it.
Were you dying to ask that lady in the check-out line of the Target about her adoption since she had a little brown baby with her, but you didn't know if you should so you just smiled at her instead? I'd like to tell you if you should say anything at all.
What's this trauma all about and can't I avoid it by adopting a very young baby?
How much does it cost? 
Go ahead and ask me! I will tell you the honest truth as I see it. 
13 years since we started down the path of adoption, and 11 years since we adopted our not-so-little any more Tess & Jude, and then Mimi and Ru after that, and my opinions and and thoughts on the subject have evolved profoundly over those years. I wish I knew so much more back in the beginning than I did them. I wish I had done things differently, I wish I had someone to ask who had been there and done that, and did it again and then has several years to stew in it all and would share those thoughts with me. 

1 comment:

  1. I can't wait for this post. I'm just starting the process to foster and would love any advise from a family who's cared for traumatized children before. I would love your advise on how to help them settle, feel safe, and process what has happened. Right now the age group that I'm being licensed for is 0-2 so I love that you've had experience with babies.

    I would also love to know what you wish you had done differently, what you wish you'd known in the beginning, and how your thoughts have changed.

    I'm overwhelmed by all that I have read, I want to hear how the process works in real life with real children. It's encouraging to hear real stories from an experienced mom (that I highly respect from years of reading the blog) as opposed to theory from a book.
    Thank you for offering to share your wisdom. I'm all ears for whatever you plan to write about.


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