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Thursday, March 17, 2016

Half-iversary


Do you get out of the house as a married couple, over night, and just be together? Celebrate your marriage and remember what you love most about each other? Soak each other in? Hold hands? Look into his eyes undistracted? For more than just a few hours and date night?

Ya, we have trouble doing that too. Big trouble! Then we just recently stumbled created this amazing thing called our half-iversary!
Obviously selfies aren't my forte! There are a few cell phone pics scattered in this post. 
Papa and I are in a pretty good habit of having "date nights." About 1x per week, sometime even more, we get out, just the 2 of us, and spend time together as a married couple. Sometimes we go to the movie or dinner, or maybe just Target or Costco because where we go doesn't really matter. Yes, we do talk about the children quite a bit during this time and other stuff too. Bills. Vacation plans. Our health. The random stuff we find in the dryer. Foster care. It's uninterrupted time together as a husband and a wife, and with 7 children, that's something that doesn't come easily unless we make it happen. 
So like I said, we're pretty good at date night. But Papa and I are NOT good at getting out of town, just the two of us, as a married couple. 'Cause really I'd rather have a root canal rather than organize the care of the kiddos while we're out of town!
Much to my surprise, Papa and Liv (2 of the greatest people on the whole entire planet! People I am not exaggerating about that!) arranged for the care of the whole crazy family so we could get out of town for our "half-iversary." You see our anniversary is in August in the middle of the birthday blitzkrieg where we have 5 birthdays, 2 forever family days, the beginning of a new school year and 1 very neglected anniversary in the span of 35 days. So during this time, we really have no time or desire to celebrate just us. 

Thus the half-iversary 6-ish months after our anniversary! Because really being flexible is a must with a big family. 
So just Papa and I went to San Diego for a long weekend. We visited museums. Went out to dinner and the theater. We staying in a gorgeous downtown hotel! We went to the beach and watched the sun set. We walked and talked and held hands. I even got slept in as long as I wanted! Sometimes we didn't say anything to each other and enjoyed the easy quietness of being married for 25 years. Even the 6+ hour drive home together (There was no He's touching me! I have to go potty!) was wonderful. 

Really ladies, I gotta say it... it's so so good for your marriage get out of town just for more than just a date night and be together. I know that it's hard to do, really I do! But it's really important to do it, and to do it regularly, like at least 1 time per year That's our goal at least, and I think it's a good one. Not that we've always been able to do it. But this little get away reaffirmed our commitment to make it happen, for our healthy marriage. 
Here are a few pics from our visit to the Center for Photographic Arts in Balboa where we got to wander around to see some amazing photography.

And the San Diego Museum of Art.
This half-iversary thing really really worked for us. Timing has never been on our side, celebrating our anniversary in August. Had we known that we've have 5 children right around that time perhaps we would have gotten married in the sprint. But of course we didn't. We said how amazing it was several times during our San Diego get away, so much do that we decided to do away with our anniversary all together and celebrate our half-iversary annually, hopefully with a getaway. I wish we would have discovered this a long while back!
I've learned a lot in my marriage, a lot about what to do and more of what not to do. I cannot express to other couples how important this time away together as husband and wife is. It's crazy important! I can truly appreciate how difficult it is to make it happen, but really, over the years couples need time to connect without the distractions of kids and errands and the daily grind. Make it happen! Even if it's just an overnighter at the restaurant followed up by the local hotel down the street. Please do it for yourselves and your marriage. 
PS-Happy St. Patrick's Day! One of my very favorite days! My GrandDaddy would not be liking me right now if I didn't at least mention it seeing as we're Irish and all. And native American. And Chinese. And Vietnamese. And Swedish. And English. And Polish... now I'm off to get my corned beef and cabbage and carrots and potatoes cooking for our annual dinner. Yum! 

3 comments:

  1. Not often enough! So glad you got to get away!

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    Replies
    1. I don't think it has to be often. But I do think it needs to be regularly. I know how hard it is to do though.

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  2. We all manage to find time for bad stuff like funerals & hospital visits -- we all should learn that we don't have to wait for any "ersary" events to make time for the good stuff! Congrats on your halfiversary! :-)

    ReplyDelete

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