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Monday, June 22, 2015

Did I tell you the one about how the home inspection went...


I interrupt the regularly scheduled pow-wow pics to bring you a PSA about what not to do during your foster care home inspection. If you're sitting down eating a danish and a cup of coffee and having a relaxing moment, I warn you to NOT read any further. The following is disturbing.

Fair warning...

I'm up at Little Cabin in the Woods, and Papa is down at Medium House in the Desert on the weekdays, so we knew he'd be the one to meet with Mrs. Foster Care House Inspector Lady. We had prepped the house before I left according to the 16-page PDF, Life Safety Inspections-The Rules in Plain English. Ya, that's really it's name of it. Sounds easy enough, right? Of course the house inspection is in the middle of a work day, so Papa had to take off work to meet with Mrs. House Inspector Lady. Actually by the time he got there, she was already in her car waiting for him. So there was no time to do a last minute check of the house.

They walked up the walkway together. What could go wrong?

Now this is the point of the story where I digress.

We have 2 dogs, Australian Shepherds. One is teenager pain-in-the-bum dog. And the other is old lady sweet-as-a-pea dog. Old lady sweet-as-a-pea dog is old. 14 years old to be exact. She moves like an old lady. She can't hear like an old lady. She snores like an old lady. And she farts like an old lady. But luckily she's not snappy or incontinent or anything... yet. She's still sweet, and I really love her with all my being.

Back to the visit with Mrs. House Inspector Lady.
16-year-old Patch was home while Papa was at work. So it's his job to make sure the dog door was open and/or let the dogs out when need be. Both dogs are really good at telling you when they need to go outside. Patch on the other hand is not good about hearing them when they tell him they need to go out. He's a teenage boy and sleeps a lot at random times of day, especially during summer break. Kinda like old lady sweet-as-a-pea dog. Except that old lady sweet-as-a-pea dog evidently could not get her message across to Patch and could not get out to do her business! And when Papa and Mrs. House Inspector Lady walked in the door, they were greeted with a large and warm pile of poo. Yep! Right there in the entrance as soon as you walk in the door, where one would only have the option of not coming in or stepping over it. It's was a big and reportedly very smelly gift right there front and center. Seriously, this type of thing has never happened before! And ya, that was the same person who got to decide if this is an acceptable foster home.

I have no idea if Papa and Mrs. House Inspector Lady stepped over the stenchy poo pile or what.  I'm pretty sure that when Papa got to this part of the story I blacked out and stopped hearing it all together. I envisioned Mrs. House Inspector Lady in a pencil skirt and blazer whipping out her clip board and feverishly scribbling notes right then and there. I didn't ask if this disqualifies us for foster care either. I'm pretty sure it would if I was in charge. But I know that the licensing process is still underway so I guess not.

'Cause like I said before, they're desperate!

Okay, back to pow-wow pics which are a much more appealing visual anyway.

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