Sometimes the decisions are difficult. Foolish naive me for thinking it would be a glorious angel-singing occasion, or even an I-know-this-is-so-my-child-at-first-glance moment. On this occasion, there just wasn't enough information to make a decision. It was a puzzle missing many of the pieces. And to get the information would require a miracle. God would need to move a mountain for us.
Our agency called at 1:36pm. I looked at the clock. She said, I have a referral for you! I screamed in her ear. Then I apologized. Somewhere in the middle of the phone call, Papa came in the front door, and it was perfect timing! We were matched with a sweet little thing whose special needs were not on our check list. And to top that off, the medical information presented to us was so scant that it made it hard to make heads or tails of the special need at all. My joy and excitement turned sour as I realized we couldn't make a decision without more information.
I tried not to look at the photos attached to the referral, to keep my distance and keep my head on my shoulders, but eventually, trying to gleam even a modicum more of info, I looked at her photos and found a gorgeous smile on the other end. And my heart melted. I kicked myself for looking at the pictures before we had decided.
Our consult with the IA doc (international adoption doctor) honestly left us with even more unanswered questions. He couldn't rule anything out. He couldn't rule anything in. Too many puzzle pieces missing.
We had to decide by 3pm in 3 days. I prayed. God, please give me an answer to this one. I don't know if you want us to say yes, this is our child, or no. You're gonna have to give me a sign. A big huge sign! A burning bush, please? Feel free to hit me over the head a couple times with a big ol' stick till I understand what you're saying. Make it clear please, 'cause you know I can be kinda dense when it comes to these type of things.
We decided to throw a hail Mary. We asked our agency if they could get more information from caregivers and orphanage staff before our deadline, in less than 48 hours. Yes? Really? They'd try?! But immediately we realized we didn't know the questions to ask, and of course they needed these questions now.
We asked if we could have another consult with our IA doc... like within the hour. Oh, he's seeing patients? Right now. I see. You say he's pretty busy. You say he already typed up some questions? But they're at his house. But his wife has agreed to email them to us from their home? Wow. That's a commitment that goes above and beyond!
Right in the middle of all this mountain pushing, someone "found" additional documentation that chronicled sweet lil' potsticker's development, including fine and gross motor skills, weight & height, social skills, language development, all complete with photos, 5 times since birth, including 1 pic at 9 days old. For those with experience with China IA, you know what an incredible, amazing, unlikely find that was.
God moved our mountain, and behind it was my burning bush. We had all the puzzle pieces needed to make the decision. This was our daughter!
Then I cyber-ran into what we are pretty sure is another adoptive mama of the lil potstick's foster sister. She had personally seen our little one about 6 weeks prior. She gave me her take on how she looked. "Loved" was the most important thing she said. More confirmation.
The next business day would bring the answers to those questions we asked from her foster mother. And more pictures, the ones on yesterday's post taken just days ago! And videos!!!
Again confirming our decision.
And again confirming it.
God again gave us just what we needed. We didn't need all that confirmation, we just needed faith in the in Him and the path He sets before us. We decided before hand that we'd trust Him and follow.
But is sure was cool that He decided to give it to us anyway!