The last official day of Tet is today. I have now found the phone with the attachment and have taken to wearing it on my belt and carry it everywhere lest the phone ring and I either can't hear it ring or heaven forbid, can only find a phone that isn't charged and miss the call! (Like she wouldn't call back, hehe) Here starts this new week, and I'm hauling the phone around everywhere trying to "will" it in to ringing! I wonder if one can actually get another person to call you just by wanting it badly enough. I mean if you REALLY wanted it badly enough? Then I forget all about adoption in general, and then it rings, and I jump out of my skin only to be disappointed when its a solicitor calling! Poor solicitors have been getting my wrath! I really just want to be officially waiting because until then it is just waiting. Adoption is just a whole series of indefinite waits. And I hope it makes me a stronger and wiser and more patient mama!
So until "the call" comes, I will just dream of gazing into those lovely deep brown eyes... dream of caring around a tattered picture... and go to sleep each night in hopes of dreaming of this faceless beautiful baby again.